The same way a sailor develops sea legs to adapt to
living on the sea, I learned to live in the rugged
terrain of my circumstances. As time passed and
experiences tested me I grew in confidence
knowing the same Father that was faithful in my
past would continue to be His usual faithful self.
My heart held hope for a bright future; believing
that Father would fulfill His promises.
As I traveled, I became familiar with the landscape.
I created a map so others would benefit from my
journey. I knew where the best resting places were
and which trails to avoid. Though I did not
particularly care for this place, I had peace of heart
and mind. Father made sure I had all that I needed
and I learned well from Him about how to stay in
His rest and care. I even sensed His heart swelling
pride and His delight over me as we walked
together. Our companionship was forged deep as
well as wide.
was going to bring "increased difficulty, increased
joy." Still, I remained secure thinking more difficulty
would be manageable with His oversight and the
enduring skills I'd learned.
wind and swirling sand in my eyes caused me to
become disoriented. I know that Father was close
by, though my senses were impaired. I remembered
His forewarning of the "increased difficulty" and I
relaxed, certain that this storm would pass quickly
and the pay off would be wonderful when the
"increased joy" arrived. I pressed forward, the best I
could, because I hoped that the "increased joy"
would be my long awaited promise fulfilled.
The storm continued with great momentum.
fear within my being; I might be alone in this storm,
I may not make it.
doctor's office as we heard those formidable words,
"Stage 4 cancer with two months to live." We made
the best of those two quick months. I seized every
moment to say all that was on my heart. When
hospice said, "At this point, he doesn't know who
you are" I could hear him whisper my name. When
my dad entered into his glory it was a huge, difficult
loss.
weep and lament, but the world will
rejoice; you will be sorrowful, but your
sorrow will be turned to joy."
me the daughter of Bob Cunningham. My dad
adored me, as I adored him. He was kind, generous
and a true gentleman. He taught me how to think
big and ask big. How many daughters have
conversations like this: "Dad, I need to ask you
something," "Ralaine, what ever the question is, the
answer is `yes!'" I delighted in my daughter-father
relationship because he was approachable,
understanding and quick to help me out of any dire
circumstance. Another advantage was when it
came to walking with God; I knew that He was a
likeness of my earthly father. I transitioned well into
the Father God - Daughter of God relationship. This
was upgraded for me when Jesus said,
good gifts to your children. So how much more will
your Father in heaven give good things to those
who ask him?" (Matt. 7:11)
of God and daughter of Bob.
our way to the 5th Appellate Court. After a
two-year wait my son, James' appeal was ready
for argument. I was told his appeal had more
hope than most; it looked very promising.
Our hopes were lifted higher during the hearing.
The State Attorney General said that improper
jury instructions were given and James' sentence
needed to be reduced. The panel of judges
seemed surprised the Attorney General had the
same position as James' Appellate Attorney. I gave
permission to let my heart soar. I believed that the
"difficulty" had passed and the "increased joy"
was about to arrive on the scene. However, inside
of two weeks a denial was handed down from the
courts. The judges did not believe the improper
instruction to the jury was harmful to James'
outcome.
easily prevent by His power."
Graham Cooke
storm and began raging within my already grief
stricken soul. Unfortunately, this was only the
beginning as more storms came, one right after
another. I questioned the might of my God.
Where was He? Why would He permit these
things? I found myself looking to heaven saying,
"My own father would not treat me this way, why
are you?" No answers came. He became a silent
observer as I thrashed around in despair.
are not changing, I will need to change. I decided
to "Walk humbly with my God."
of unanswered questions, unfulfilled promises,
and broken dreams so I could move forward with
Him. My unanswered questions could have
become an offensive stumbling block. Or worse, I
could have created a belief system to answer the
questions God was not answering. My need to
understand had to die while I gave power to faith.
storm weathered me, stripping away weaknesses
and fears. I gained a maturity that was not there
before. I discovered that I am not only a daughter
of God, but I am growing into a woman of God.
Like the upgrade Jesus gave to His disciples when
He said, "I am no longer calling you servants but
friends," a whole new territory opened and it's full
of unknown adventure. For now, I develop my
"sea legs" while I continue to wait, with faith, for
the "increased joy."